Translated from original Bengali by Saikat Guha
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, I’ll go to your abode
Benimadhav, do you still remember me?
Benimadhav, the maddening flute under gulmohur tree
You played, I was then in Malati School
Solving math, the classroom was a little one,
Outside the husband of our ma’am beside her,
I was then in class IX, I was then in saree
We got acquainted at the home of Sulekha.
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, I was good at study
You came from city for a casual visit, I was dark
I rushed from the place into my room:
Benimadhav, my father worked in a small shop,
Bees hum and buds still bloom in garden
I used to mistake known sums during evening study,
I was then in class IX, I was then sixteen
We met, Benimadhav, aside the bridge secretly.
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, after so many days,
Tell me, do you still recall those days?
Have you told your beloved about it?
Just one day I saw her beside you
Under light, the light was so enchanting!
I admit, your match seemed to me perfect
It eased my eyes, it burned my eyes
I said on way home, ‘Be they happy!’
In these days I go to sleep in the ground-floor room
The bed is on the floor on which fall moonbeams,
My sister just next to me is lost in the maze of life
I don’t know with whom she lives now-a-days,
I’ve got food today, but tomorrow?—Devil’s sitting there!
I’m the embroidery teacher in this locality now;
Still fire, Benimadhav, fire is burning within me,
What happens if I also become a bad girl?
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, I’ll go to your abode
Benimadhav, do you still remember me?
Benimadhav, the maddening flute under gulmohur tree
You played, I was then in Malati School
Solving math, the classroom was a little one,
Outside the husband of our ma’am beside her,
I was then in class IX, I was then in saree
We got acquainted at the home of Sulekha.
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, I was good at study
You came from city for a casual visit, I was dark
I rushed from the place into my room:
Benimadhav, my father worked in a small shop,
Bees hum and buds still bloom in garden
I used to mistake known sums during evening study,
I was then in class IX, I was then sixteen
We met, Benimadhav, aside the bridge secretly.
Benimadhav, Benimadhav, after so many days,
Tell me, do you still recall those days?
Have you told your beloved about it?
Just one day I saw her beside you
Under light, the light was so enchanting!
I admit, your match seemed to me perfect
It eased my eyes, it burned my eyes
I said on way home, ‘Be they happy!’
In these days I go to sleep in the ground-floor room
The bed is on the floor on which fall moonbeams,
My sister just next to me is lost in the maze of life
I don’t know with whom she lives now-a-days,
I’ve got food today, but tomorrow?—Devil’s sitting there!
I’m the embroidery teacher in this locality now;
Still fire, Benimadhav, fire is burning within me,
What happens if I also become a bad girl?
What I Feel:
Joy Goswami is a prominent contemporary Bengali poet. This much-loved and much-recited poem says about a girl's frustrated experience of first love in teenage. She was shy and also suffered from lack of confidence because she was 'dark' in complexion and she belonged to lower middle-class family. As a result, she could not express her love for Benimadhav who was engaged to another lady. Now, the maiden lives a lonely life in hardship and manages to earn her bread by teaching the work of embroidery. But the fire of passion within her can hardly be extinguished. The poem is remarkable for its earnestness of tone and underlying pathos. The original Bengali poem has a lovely musical structure which is not possible to create in translation. However, the fine confessional tone of the poem marked by serenity may be appreciated even in translation.
